In the year 2000 I was happily married (for 13 years, together for 20) to my college sweetheart, with a lovely home and two young children.

Then one day I began the process of discovering my husband’s long-standing affair—with someone I knew very well. Within 9 months my marriage was over.

And though I met and married a wonderful man— and have been married for over 10 years—the hurt and pain of that time is still there. Still palpable.

I was (and still am) very lucky to have an incredible network of friends and family—without whom I would have never come out the other side as successfully as I did. Yet even among my closest friends, I would experience “well-meaning” advice, words and comments that really stung.

Things that I myself might have said prior to my divorce, having no idea how powerful those seemingly innocent words could be.

“It’s too bad you have children—you’ll always be connected because of them.”
This was very painful to hear. My kids were often the singular reason that I got out of bed many mornings following my divorce. There were so many times that I would wake up not knowing how I was going to face the day. But then I’d remember my children—and the responsibility I had to them—and I did what I needed to do. Having them around me made me feel happy, loved, not alone. I can’t imagine my life without them….click next below to continue.